


Visitor

by Burning_Ice (orphan_account)



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Young Justice (Cartoon), Young Justice - All Media Types
Genre: Alfred's Cookies, Because I can, Grayson wants his cuddles, I FOUND THIS, Jason Visits, Jason is violent, Lagaan gets bullied, Season 2, Tim's a little hacker, Wally Hate, batfam, decided to post it, i have no idea what it is, ideas?, the team doesnt agree with this, the team is surprised
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-20
Updated: 2016-06-07
Packaged: 2018-05-15 05:33:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5773276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Burning_Ice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Red heard we were having a bad day, someone’s probably trying to kill him, so he came to visit.” Nightwing tapped the cigar against his lip.</p><p>“Yep,” Red Hood said. “Damian’s mad. Won’t let me in the house."<br/>____</p><p>After coming back from a mission one day, the Young Justice members are surprised to walk into the Red Hood-- and their day only seems to get more confusing as Nightwing and Robin greet this known villain in a surprising way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Entering the Cave right after a mission, the Team could still hear the computerized voice behind them announcing their arrival as they got into a defencive stance. They could see their own individual reflections in the red helmet as the invader took it off, placing it under his arm. He raised a cigar to his mouth, giving a small smirk as it was placed between his teeth.

The Red Hood.

They had never met him before, and at the time, they had not known he had any connections to Batman and his sons at all. Despite that, they knew he was on the top of the ‘Bad Guys’ list, and that he was a danger to them all.

Red Hood had laughed at their threat to attack him, though, and he just said, “What’s up?”

“What are you doing here?” Kaldur, always taking charge, spoke first. But he was surprised when Nightwing pushed him aside, walking up to Red Hood.

“Give me one,” Nightwing said, his polite, authoritative tone suddenly husky and vapid. Nightwing’s shoulders sagged and he put out his hand for Red Hood.

Red Hood took a long, deep drag from his cigar. “Nothing much,” Red Hood answered Kaldur’s question. His lips moved around his cigar and the smoke escaped as he spoke. “Just heard that ‘Wing and Baby Bird had a bad day.” He fished around in his pockets, taking out another cigar, handing it to Nightwing. Batman’s protege lit the end by himself, taking a breath from it.

“A bad day.” Robin pushed his way through the crowd. “A _bad day._ As if. Go an hour without Al’s cookies and you can call it _a_ _bad day_ ,” He said. He walked up to Red Hood, taking the roll of tobacco from the anti-hero’s mouth, sticking it between his own two teeth. “We went _three_ and we had to deal with bratty, obnoxious, stupid villains. The only _real_ competition there was Deathstroke, and he held back because we _all_ know how he adores Nightwing.”

Nightwing blushed at that but kept silent, deciding that it had been too long of a day to stand up _yet again_ for Slade.

Red Hood scoffed, his red mask looking blankly at the ceiling. “Well, Mister Grumpy Pants, I would Imagine that you took them down quite easily, then.”

“As if,” Robin said. He hooked his glove to the Holo-computer, easily downloading any information he got over the mission. “DaddyBats decided that Nightwing and I had to hold back so the Team can ‘learn from their mistakes’.” He made quotation marks with his one available hand.

Kaldur frowned. “Is there something I am missing?” He asked. Everyone could tell from his tone that it wasn’t a question. He was telling Nightwing and Robin that they needed to back down. That they were doing something _wrong_.

“No,” Nightwing said. “Not really. Red heard we were having a bad day, someone’s probably trying to kill him, so he came to visit.” He tapped the cigar against his lip.

“Yep,” Red hood said. “Damian’s mad. Won’t let me in the house. I heard that Kid Flash was being a little b****, too. Decided to put an end to it.”

Robin nodded. “Did you, now?” His voice was sarcastic, and his eyes were focused on the holographic screen. He didn’t believe it.

"Yep," Red Hood said again. “Someone can’t talk to _my_ Dickie-Bird like that and expect to get away with it.” His eyes scanned the crowd. “Doesn’t look like he’s here. I guess it’ll just have to wait.”

"He's back in Central,” Nightwing said. “Ever since he did that ‘Make everyone think you’re dead and just come back like nothing happened’ stunt, he’s been chilaxing with his family. With Artemis, too. I swear, she doesn’t even like him anymore. She just feels like she has something to prove, and Kid Flash was the _only man available._ ”

“More like ‘only _kid_ ’,” Robin laughed. “And I’m pretty sure there’s a reason why he’s that way.”

Connor’s frustration grew. He could see Kaldur’s open mouth at how Nightwing and Robin trash-talked their team mate with a known _criminal_. No one was doing anything about the situation, watching two of their leaders suddenly do the unexplainable.

Nightwing laughed. “No doubt.”

“I’m completely and utterly convinced that she’s in love with Kaldur,” Jason commented. “But that may just be the little Dick screaming in my head.”

Nightwing frowned. “I don’t scream.”

“Oh, right,” Tim said. “He does this ‘manly yelling’.”

“ _Why isn't anyone doing anything_!” Connor finally yelled. That seemed to snap everyone out of their trance, because suddenly everyone regained their fighting stance, and Robin and Nightwing stared at them with shock on their faces.


	2. Chapter 2

Batman’s sure that he’ll never get use to the oddity called his family. Each one came from a different background, had different personalities, and yet they all considered themselves related. It didn’t always work out, but when push comes to shove, they all stick together like glue. And that, for the better or worse, included Batman.

Right now? It was for the worst. Jason always had… a more negative effect on the clan. He always managed to loosen their control and let them show a slightly wilder side of themselves. Not corrupt, but wild, so Batman really wasn’t surprised when he walked into the cave to find a fight; weapons and all. Nor was he surprised to see that his three boys were wining (and more than likely the cause of it).

The smarter ones had stayed out of the fight. Like Impulse. He scurried around the edges, looking more like he was trying to stop them verbally, and failing. Batgirl was leaning against the wall, watching the scene with an amused smile. As long as the Batboys were wining, Batman knew she wouldn’t interfere. There were a few other girls by her, who seemed to be debating whether or not they should join the fight. They were probably only staying still on Batgirl’s command.

Batman sighed. He knew it was wrong to leave Red Hood alone. The Team really wasn’t due back yet, but he should have known that Nightwing and Robin would have wanted to speed up the mission just to see him.

“Stop,” Batman hissed. It wasn’t any louder than his usual voice, but everyone heard. All the fighting stopped, except for the last punch that Red Hood delivered to Lagan. “ _What_ do you think you’re doing?”

Everyone seemed to simultaneously look at Red Hood. No one dared to tell Batman that what they were doing was obvious, though. Nobody wanted to risk facing his wrath.

Batman rolled his eyes. “Briefing room, now.” Batman glared at his boys. “Including the Red Hood.” He left without another word, leaving Young Justice to clean up after themselves.

It took a couple minutes for the team to reassemble themselves and do as Batman asked, but they managed. They wearily watched as Nightwing Robin, and the villain, walked in front of the group, quietly and excitedly whispering among themselves.

Batman stood quietly, waiting for them. When they entered he said, “For today and until further notice, the team will not be having any missions. Any missions given will be small, and only require a small group. Your priority will be here, in the cave, watching over the Red Hood.” Batman watched the members of the team, seeing their questioning faces.

Aqualad stepped up. “I do not mean any disrespect,” he said, “But why is he here?”

Batman grunted. “After an accident involving all his safehouses—“ Red Hood gave a small laugh here and mumbled something like, _Sure, ’accidents,’_ before Nightwing silenced him with a sharp elbow to the ribs—“Red Hood requested a place to stay.” Batman continued with a single glare at his children. “The watchtower and the Batcave are not an option,” The Watchtower for obvious reasons, and the Batcave for an incident that happened not too long ago involving Pink Paint, a little bit of alcohol and no supervision. “Leaving the Cave as the most suitable location.”

Batman knew he would regret this. “Any questions?” Gosh—he could already feel a headache coming on.

“Yeah!” Lagan stepped up, his jaw an ugly shade of purple from the earlier punch Jason had given him. “Why’d you give in to that request, huh? He should be in jail, _where he belongs_! And why do you let your two protégés prance around with him like they’re--!”

Jason took one step forward, and Lagan shut up, effectively remembering what had happened last time he bad-mouthed Batman’s (not) sidekicks. Behind his mask, Jason rolled his eyes. _They were all such wimps. No wonder they weren’t allowed in Gotham._

“The Red Hood,” Batman said, “is staying here for reasons that do not concern you. Any _other_ questions?”

No one answered, and so he headed for the Zeta Tube. Before stepping into the transportation device he glanced at Jason, hissing out, “Red Hood— _Behave_.”

The Red Hood gave him a lopsided smile and a salute, his fingers crossed behind his back where his brothers could see it, but Batman could not. “Sure thing. No killing. No harassing. No sword fights. No blowing things—or people—up. And no bullets unless they’re Kryptonite. And those can’t be used on Superboy. We’ve talked about this. I got it.”

Batman sighed, knowing Jason’s ‘innocent’ voice meant something disastrous. And he knew he’d be kicked for the last rule he had given Jason, and knew very well that Jason said that one out loud just for the laughs.

As soon as the Zeta Beam announced Batman’s departure, Jason’s lopsided smile got replaced by a dark, mischievous one. “So,” he said. “Now that the formalities are over….” He silently to pull out a suspicious looking bag filled with white powder.

Kaldur’s eyes widened. That couldn’t be….

Dick yelled so loud everyone in the room flinched. “YES!” He jumped toward Red Hood in small excited steps. “Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes!!”

Tim glanced up from his holocomputer, and then looked back down. Then, he slowly seemed to realize what was going on and looked back up. “Is that….?” He asked.

Jason nodded. Tim smiled.

Kaldur stepped between them, holding his hands up in a stopping motion. He frowned. “I do not understand why you two are so lenient when it comes to ‘Red Hood’,” Kaldur started, glaring at Robin and Nightwing, “But I cannot permit _drugs_ with in the cave’s—“

“Drugs?” Red Hood snorted. “How much do you guys know about me? I spend a living making sure not to sell drugs to underage kids. _This_ is ten times better.”

Kaldur frowned. “I do not understand.”

“It’s _suuuuugaaaaaar_!!!!!” Nightwing practically screeched, jumping excitedly. Artemis muttered behind them, “ _I don’t know if giving him sugar is such a good idea…”_ But Nightwing ignored it and continued to jump around Red Hood, repeating the word over and over again.

Tim chuckled, not willing to admit that he wast tempted to follow Nightwing’s lead. “Dude…. How…?”

Red Hood growled. “I was looking for the _cookies_ and you know how Alfred kept them in the cabinet? Well—First, he _updated_ the freakin’ security, so who f***ing knows how long I spent breaking into that thing— _and then the cookies weren’t even there!_ ” He rolled his eyes. “He moved them! So—I had to settle for plain sugar.”

Nightwing laughed. “Dude, everyone knows that he moved them. After Terry managed to break into the cabinet—“ he sighed, “—We’ve taught him well—Alfred’s poor heart couldn’t take us stealing the cookies before dessert, so….”

“He moved them,” Tim finished. “Into B’s office.”

Red Hood’s eyes widened comically. He voice lowered, and the team couldn’t help the shiver that went down their back from the fear in his voice. “No!”

Nightwing let out a sob. “I know!” He cried. “We’ll never see them again!!”

“Until dessert,” Tim reminded him.

“Until dessert,” Red hood agreed.

If anything, that seemed to make Nightwing cry harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: The three of them on a sugar high
> 
> wow, the batfamily always makes their small family seem crazier by the second


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, super short, but someone mentioned a JLA member walking in on their sugar high and eventually this ended up popping into my head when i re-read the comments.

Superman coughed. Batman groaned. Really, by now Batman should be used to it. Why was his life so complicated?

“Um,” Superman gave Batman a nervous glance. “What are they doing?”

Batman pinched the bridge of his nose. In front of him were his four family members, only three that were open allies to him. But that wasn’t the innerving part. He’s gotten use to the fact that his family actually gets along every once in a while. No, It was the fact that Babs was on Dick’s back, and Tim on Jason’s, all of them with long black blankets tied to their necks in a poor imitation of Batman’s cape.

And the song.

Gosh, Batman knew he’d regret letting a Thirteen Year old Dick give him a theme song. Batman really should have guessed that he wouldn’t have forgotten about it by now.

“Don’t ask,” Batman said, turning around. Hearing Jason sing “ _nanananananananana”_ was not on his list of things he wanted to do today. No one was dead. No one was dying. That was all Batman needed to know. “Let’s go.”

“ _Batman!_ ” Nightwing sung just as the two league members stepped into the Zeta Beam.

Batman really needed some of Alfred’s cookies right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: Movie night. It's a bat-family special. Really, It's Jason's favorite. The rest of the team doesn't like it so much.  
> Oh, and Artemis is here.  
> Oh, and so is Steph.


	4. Chapter 4

“Will you _shut up?!?”_ Red hood hissed at M’gann and he stuffed another mouthful of popcorn past his lips. “I swear, you brats don’t stop screaming.”

There were tears streaming down her face and a hand covered her mouth out of horror. Lagaan had a “protective” arm around her, but at this point he looked just as sick as she did. Very few other members of the team had stuck around, most of them leaving after the first five minutes of gore. Turns out, they’re not as strong as they claimed.

Who knew a movie could be such a turn-off?

Especially this one. It was one of Jason’s favorite bat-family specials. And Bat-family specials are basically summed up to: one of those times Jason and the rest were bored enough to take a camera on a mission. And it was Epic.

Jason winced as another one of the team members let out a piercing scream. Jeez—that part wasn’t even scary. That was supposed to be _funny_. Seriously, a guy running away with no arms? Hilarious. He looks like a waddling chicken. He could even hear Nightwing say some half-assed remark about it behind camera before he knocks the dude out. (And then Jason killed the man, but that was later and off-camera so no one gets to see his epicness.) Sadly, Jason couldn’t find the decency to laugh with his brothers. Not when his ears were practically _falling off_ because some sidekicks can’t keep their panties dry-- _!_

“Are you sure it’s okay to let the… _younger_ members of the team watch this?” Artemis glanced at Tim nervously. She had joined them after she heard who was at the cave. Didn’t really believe the news at first, so she wanted to come check it out herself. Now she was leaning on the back of the couch, watching over M’gann and Jason’s shoulder (Jason can’t stand sitting next to M’gann because he’s pretty sure her panties _really_ aren’t dry--) and her face looked a little green, but she was pretty strong. Jason still couldn’t believe that she was with Kid B****.

She totally deserved Kaldur. (Dammit, mini Dick!)

“Don’t worry,” Jason whispered. “Wally already left.”

She snorted at this and—yep. Jason definitely liked her. She had fire in her. Kind of reminded him of Steph. Except, ya’know, less girly. Not that Steph was girly in the first place (and Jason had mental image of seeing them both as princesses but that just gave him a headache and a real need to invent mind bleach) so he left it at that.

He heard another screech (this time at a guy with no eyes, like really? Ever heard of Deathstroke before, sweetheart?) and Jason Really couldn’t take it anymore. So he pushed her off the couch. That managed to snap Lagaan out of his what-the-hell-am-I-watching trance.

Of course it did.

“What is your _problem?_ ” Lagaan snapped.

“Your face,” was what Jason answered. And it was Hilarious to watch Lagaan’s reaction to the most babyish answer in the world. His face got all red ( _oh, that so does not complement his skin color,_ Jason could imagine Steph say) and his eyes widened in shock. His fists bundled up and shook.

“Excuse me?” He said, his voice attempting to stay calm.

“Oh, wait,” Jason said, and ate another handful of popcorn. “I said the wrong annoyance.”

He then proceeded to flick kernels at M’gaan’s shocked form on the floor. Oh, Lagaan was so gonna punch him for this. Or try to.

Then it came. The fist was a blur, but Jason would have caught it no matter how fast it was going. The only reason he didn’t was because another hand popped out of nowhere, catching the fist for him. He recognized the glove, so he really didn’t bother giving a reaction.

Stephanie—or Spoiler, really—pursed her lips (under the mask, but Jason knew her well enough to know her facial expressions). “That’s my brother’s face,” She said. “And this is yours.” She gave him a hard smack that sent him flying to the floor. “And I’ll be doing the same thing to Batsy’s next time I see him because he is _soooo unfair!!!”_ She groaned and draped herself dramatically over the back of the couch. Artemis gave her a weird look and didn’t bother to help Lagaan. Looked like M’gann had him anyway.

“What’s unfair?” Dick asked, genuinely concerned about his sister. Ah, always count on Dick to show his affection. He turned to face her, muting the TV so that he wouldn’t miss a word.

“Why did he let _Red Hood_ come into the cave but not meeeeeee?” She whined. “I’m doing socially okay, right? I’m not socially constipated like most of the family! I wanted to be on this team! I even did my chores last night, so why didn’t he let me come?! Its sooo not fair!”

Jason’s nose scrunched. “I’m not on this team.”

“Who are you?” Artemis asked.

Stephanie smiled at the chance to talk to one of the team members (although Jason wasn’t sure it was meeting them or _pranking_ them that she was excited for) and stood up, putting her hand out for a shake. “I’m Spoiler. Pure awesomeness and Robin’s ex.”

Tim groaned. “Do you _always_ have to introduce yourself like that? Maybe you are socially constipated.”

Artemis smiled and took her hand. “Artemis. Nice to meet you. You’re a hero because of Batman?”

“Yeah,” Spoiler said. “Like Red Hood and Nightwing and Robin--“

Artemis did a double take. Red Hood worked with Batman?

“Steph!” Tim hissed at her. “She didn’t know Jay was part of the clan!”

Spoiler covered her already covered face where her mouth would be, giving a gasp. “Sorry,” She whispered. “I forgot the back story. Jason’s a criminal.”

“Thanks,” Jason said sarcastically. “Now she knows my name, too.”

They heard a snarl. Oh, great, Jason forgot that Fish boy and his lover were still in the room. Now the guy was going to go on a rant about how Batman worked with scum like him and how _wrong_ that was and how Batman was a bad mentor and---

“Batman _works_ with you?! _That’s_ why he’s letting you stay here?!!” Lagaan spit.

How did Jason guess?

Nightwing rolled his eyes. “Lagaan, be rational,” He tried. “Batman has his reasons—“

“Of course _you_ would say that!” Lagaan hissed. “Look at what you were willing to do to the team! You’re exactly like _him!_ ”

Jason could see Artemis’s jaw tighten, but she didn’t do or say anything. She just glared at Lagaan, almost as if that would make him shut up. Robin did the same. Jason liked Tim—but really, that kid had to grow a spine.

Jason growled. “Is that seriously a reference to Wally’s death?”

Spoiler sighed. “Please, that incident was _so_ last year. Like really. Wally isn’t dead anymore. And he’s kind of a jerk.”

“This isn’t about that,” Lagaan said. “This is about the fact that he was willing to do all of that behind the teams back and work with criminals like _Aqualad_ —“

“Aqualad was a double agent,” Jason said, almost as if explaining it to a five year old. Jason was pretty sure that mentally, Lagaan was. “There’s a difference.”

“And what if he wasn’t?” Lagaan said. “What if he really _was_ working with Manta and—“

“You would have died whether Nightwing made the deal or not,” Stephanie shrugged. “Oh, how beautiful the end of the world is.”

Lagaan growled. “He could have told us.”

“Oh no!” Jason cried, making Artemis jump. “He didn’t tell us his secret but he told _them!_ Superman! It’s not fair! Now everything is _his_ fault!”

Steph sobbed. “The horrors!” She paused and turned to Lagaan. “Oh, wait, you know what’s also horrible? Your _acting_.”

Jason snorted. “I know. It’s seriously no wonder Nightwing didn’t tell you.”

Tim snorted softly. “Remember M’gann’s acting? When she was ‘escaping’ from Black Manta’s hold?”

M’gann frowned. “What do you mean?” She asked.

Nightwing groaned. “Oh my gosh. You mean after she broke Kaldur’s mind?” Nightwing laughed and Robin nodded. “Slade called me later, and he wouldn’t stop laughing. Deathstroke. Laughing.” He let out a high pitched giggle. “He told me that I was lucky it was just him and Artemis there, otherwise the other villains would have caught on. He said it was _that bad_.”

Artemis looked about a hair’s breath away from smiling, though she seemed disturbed at the thought of Nightwing and Deathstroke talking. Before she could mention it, Steph flaunted her body, straightening her back and holding her head up high. “Oh, look at me! I’m M’gann! I’d never hurt a fly but now I wasn’t Artemis’s blood because she made me sit on a stool!”

Tim fake-gasped. “Goody-goody two shoes? Me? No! I _always_ work with assassins like Cheshire. It’s _fun!_ ”

Nightwing doubled over in laughter. Artemis let out a snort, but didn’t say anything. Steph was giggling.

M’gann flushed, opening and then closing her mouth as she looked for something to say. Lagaan let out a growl. “My Angel Fish isn’t a bad actor--!”

Jason started to laugh so hard he nearly choked on his popcorn. “Angel Fish?” He finally said when he could. “Is that supposed to be like ‘ _darling_ ’ or _‘babe’_?”

Steph snorted. “C’mere my dear, dear little sushi.”

Tim rolled his eyes. “I want to finish the movie,” He said. “Can we watch it somewhere else?”

Nightwing shrugged. “Sure thing, I have a TV in my room.”

Jason jumped. “You mean we’ve been watching this move next to Angel Fish when we could have watched it without _any disturbances?_ ”

They all got up, leaving a mess of popcorn and soda behind. As they entered the hallway, Artemis could here Nightwing ask, “Where’s Dami? I thought you were watching him.”

Spoiler answered, “I don’t know. He entered the cave with me.”

Artemis frowned when she couldn’t hear their conversation anymore. Who was Dami?

“Good,” Lagaan said. “Let them leave. They’re all jerks.”

Artemis rolled her eyes, helping him up. Then she turned to help M’gann. “You okay?” She asked her.

M’gann nodded. She pulled a piece of popcorn out of her hair. “Yeah,” She said. “I just don’t get why they’re so mean.”

Artemis shrugged. “I don’t know. They seemed kind of cool. They’re just really Gotham.” She got up and headed toward Nightwing’s room. The movie _was_ gross, but she was kind of curious as to how it ended.

M’gann frowned, her and Lagaan now the only ones in the room. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I need some other interactions besideds l'gaan and the batclan. I mean, the batclan will always be there, but I need a different team member. I just dont know who.
> 
> Connor, maybe? Or blue beetle and impulse?


	5. OhmygoshitwasdarkandscaryandIdon'tknowwhattodo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone wanted Bart? Here you go!

Jamie grimaced. The Bat-clan was too loud for his liking-- which he found rather ironic, because he would have thought them to be dark and stalker-y. Instead, they were constantly fighting, and seemed to have this endless supply of gory videos. They sung on the top of their lungs, complained about the store-bought cookies (and wouldn't even dare come near M'gann's, not that Jamie could blame them) and picked way too many fights with everyone and anyone. The girl-- Spoiler?-- was better, but she managed to make everyone feel like an idiot. And she could hit. Hard. From now on, Jamie will consider the "you hit like a girl" insult as a complement.

He had finally retreated to his room after Nightwing had started to sing "Baby", and picked up the closest book, sitting on his bed. He blatantly ignored scarab's comments, which basically consisted of, " _These 'Bats' would be suitable allies,"_  and, " _The Red Hood's ways are logical."_ Because  of course, the Scarab loved the only people in the world he wish didn't exist.

He was well into the book by the time Bart rushed in, not even bothering to open the door. He vibrated right in, jumping on Jamie's bed and crushed him into a hug. Jamie was about to yell at him-- they were  _falling_ into Tartarus and he didn't know if they would make it and  _Bart_ why did you have to crash into his room  _now_ \-- but then he saw tears streaming down Bart's cheeks, and decided demigods and camps and falling OTPs could wait until later.

He pushed Bart away until he was a comfortable distance away (since he was sure the Scarab would kill Bart with or without his liking if Bart kept on invading their personal space) and frowned. "Whats wrong?" 

"I don't know!!" Bart cried with that over-dramaticness he put into everything and then proceeded to cry into one of Jamie's pillows.

Jamie sighed. "C'mon, _hermano_ ,  tell me what happened." He wanted to pick up the book already.

"I was in my room," Bart started, but then the rest was buried into the pillow, and probably said too fast for Jamie to understand. Jamie sighed, and told Bart to start over again. It took a couple of tries, but finally, Bart managed to choke it out in a slightly manageable pace. "I was in my room, just, y'know, doing stuff, and then boom! the lights go out and they wouldn't turn on and at first I was like, 'yeah whatever,' but then I was like, 'Gosh it's really dark,' and then  _all_ my stuff turned off-- like my clock and even my computer and I didn't know what to do and then I'm telling you something moved and Jamie don't laugh it's not funny, I'm telling you it really moved and then someone laughed but I don't know how they got in because my door was closed the whole time and I thought maybe it was Nightwing because sometimes he does that but then there was this voice and it was all like, 'I'm not Nightwing,' and it called me an 'inferior idiot' and I got so scared and Jamie please help there's a monster in my room and I can't--"

"Bart," Jamie said sternly.

"--do this by my self, I had to vibrate through my door because it  _wouldn't_ open and I left Flashamoozle in there all by him self--"

"Bart."

"--unless you count the goldfish, the goldfish is there but he can't protect him and so that means the monster can eat him or something and--

"Bart-- Who the heck is Flashamoozle?"

"--he must be lonely and... Wait... You don't know who Flashamoozle is?" Bart looked at him innocently, holding the pillow in a death grip. By this point, there were tears streaming down his face. Whatever had been in there had really scared Bart. But then again, a lot of things scared Bart. "He's my stuffed turtle."

Jamie frowned. "You named a turtle after the Flash."

Bart threw the pillow at Jamie. "That's not the point!"

Jamie rolled his eyes. "Bart, I'm sure it was nothing." Bart started to protest, but Jamie said, "It probably was Nightwing. Or one of the guests we have in the Cave. They've been playing pranks like this on everyone."

Bart wiped the tears off his face and sniffed loudly. "But they're all in the common room. They're watching My Little Pony."

"My little Pony?" Jamie asked. "Actually, you know what,  _ese_? I don't even want to know. If you're really that worried, we'll go look in your room. I'm sure it was nothing."

Bart looked unsure. "But I don't want to get eaten."

Jamie growled, looking longingly at his book. "We aren't going to get eaten. Let's go."

Jamie hoped he would get the chance to finish his book.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you guess who it is? But If you guess I won't rely. I'm sure you all know who it'll be, tho. So, Yay!


	6. Chapter 6

_Jamie Reyes, this is a bad idea._

And perhaps that was the only thing that Jamie caught from the Scarab's long and infuriating speech, because he completely agreed. Why in the world, with the life that Jamie lived in, did he doubt that there might  _actually_ be a turtle-eating-monster in Bart's room? It's not like he hasn't seen weirder things-- like the fact that there was a freaking piece of alien tech that was meant to take over him and the world _on his back_ \-- and it wasn't like he wasn't open minded when it came to the ideas of magic and supernatural beings. He figured that the reason he hadn't believed was because it had come out of Bart's mouth. Bart doesn't necessarily  _lie_ , but he does tend to over-exaggerate things until you can say that that was  _not_ how it happened, at all.

As soon as Jamie had entered Bart's room, Bart clinging to his arm to the point that he might as well have just been hanging off of it, the door closed behind them. Just like Bart had said, it didn't open again. The Scarab happily informed him that now, Bart could easily escape the room the same way he did the first time, but there was nothing that Jamie could do without the Scarab's help.

It only got worse after that.

The only real sound that was in the room was Bart's battery-run filter from the fish tank, but Jamie was sure he could hear something else. It was the kind of noise that you were sure you heard it, but then you doubt yourself because the noise doesn't happen again and you're left with this lingering uncertainty. Bart's room also happened to be a mess, which wasn't such a surprise, but in the darkness of the room every shadow and pile of clothing on the floor looked like another thing that might jump out at them.

Suddenly, Bart's tears didn't seem worth pushing off his falling OTPs and hours cuddled under his reading lamp.

*

"Pinkie Pie!" Jason jumped, pulling a face of pure horror. "Don't!"

Tim's eyes were as wide as saucers. "She's going to ruin the whole plan!"

Dick curled up into a ball and hid behind his hands. "I can't watch."

L'gaan stared at the brightly colored TV screen with eyes of disinterest, "Are they serious?" He asked. He glanced at Artemis, who just shrugged. M'gann looked confused. He knew that the Bat boys were odd, they had figured that out a  _long_ time ago, but this was...

A scream suddenly pierced the air, and in an automatic reaction, Jason yelled, "F***!" pulled out his Kryptonite gun and shot two bullets straight at the TV, eyes closed. The images of ponies immediately died out and he cracked one eye open before realizing what he had done.

Tim's eyes narrowed in a glare and turned to look at Jason accusingly. Dick looked at the TV in disbelief. Stephanie's face slowly, slowly started to turn red under her mask.

"Red," She said, in a dangerously low voice, and M'gann wondered if they were going to do anything about where the _scream_ originated from.  "Now we'll never know what happens."

"The plan..." Dick said, still in shock. "Pinkie Pie..."

Tim jumped Jason with fists and pure fury and Spoiler joined him soon after, and Dick sincerely still looked like he had just watched someone kick a puppy.

Artemis coughed to catch their attention, "Guys? The yelling.... Someone might, ya' know... Need us?"

None of the boys (and Steph) even bothered to look up. Dick yelled something like, "Screw dead bodies!" before joining in the fight, which seemed to be more of a lets-punch-whoever-we-can than an actual Jason-you-ass fight.

Artemis eventually gave up, because it really seemed like the Bats didn't care, and she lead Lg'aan and M'gann down the hallway to people's personal rooms where she was sure the sound had come from. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, and Artemis was about to turn around and leave and dismiss it as Bart finding another spider in his room before the screech resounded again. It sent a chill right down to her core, the intensity and pure  _fear_ in the scream, and she could feel goosebumps rise on her arms.

And it came from... Bart's room. And it was too real to have just been a spider-infestation problem.

Lg'aan tried to open the door, but the key pad refused to recognize them, and the door wouldn't budge. Miss Martian used her telekinesis to blast the door in, and Artemis stepped in first, her weapons drawn and ready. It was dark, the light from the hallway seeping over the clothes and books strewn on the floor. On the bed there was a blanket placed over two lumps, and it took a while for Artemis to figure out that the lumps were  _people_.

She walked slowly, cautiously toward the brown sheet and on the count of a mental three, she threw the sheet off, her bow staff pointing at the people under there.

Jamie and Bart both let out the same kind of shriek she had heard earlier, eyes closed and mouths open, hugging each other like two chicks watching a horror film and the screaming didn't stop, not until Artemis shouted, "Guys--Guys!" And they recognized her voice, slowly calmed down but didn't untangle their limbs. They were shaking and Bart had tears streaming down his face, Jamie looked close to following.

"Oh, my gosh," M'gann flew over, she slowly helped them to their shaking feet and hugged each of them. She could really feel the raw emotion poring off of them in  _waves_. "What happened?!?"

"It took Flashamoozle," Bart muttered, and he shuttered.

Jamie glared at him for a second before saying, "Something... Broke in to the cave. I'm not sure what it was, but Scarab says it had the readings of a human."

"Human?" Steph suddenly leaned into the room from the doorway, causing M'gann to jump. "Like, people human?  Short and sounded like the ten year old son of the Devil?"

Bart blushed, "It did sound like a kid. A murdering, blood thirsty, turtle-eating--"

Tim popped next to Steph and said, "It sounds like the Devil Spawn."

Jason laughed, "The Turtle-eating is new."

"Eh," Dick said, putting a hand on Tim's shoulder. "There's a lot about him you don't know." He sighed before continuing his walk. "C'mon, we can finish the episode in my room."

"F*** yeah," Jason said, quickly following.

"Oooooh," Steph squealed, "I bet you ten bucks it's Rainbow Dash who saves the day!"

Tim stared at his team mates, looking torn for a second before saying, "Guys, we should look for Little D."

Steph groaned, turning around, her brothers doing the same. "Tiiiiiiiimmmmyyyyy!!"

Dick sighed, "Now that you  _said_ it, we  _have_ to do it."

"Stupid Devil Spawns," Jason cursed. "If we find a dead body, you can't let him blame it on me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #Slowlybutsurelyrunningoutofideas? #help? #Ideas
> 
> PLEASE PEOPLE
> 
> Hope you enjoyed XD

**Author's Note:**

> Um.... Okay? I found this and I decided, eh, what the heck. Might as well post it. I'd like to continue it, but any ideas i had while writing it are gone now.....
> 
> any suggestions?


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